My heart has been trodden on by a silver stiletto shoe.

And yes, it hurts. It really, really hurts. I didn’t realise I was into him that much in the first place. Here I am thinking this is all well and good, that it’s just some silly schoolgirl flight of fancy. I’d convinced myself I didn’t care, that nothing big was really going to come out of it. But sometime during the last few weeks it’s crept into my mind that hey, perhaps I do have a chance with him. Perhaps I do care after all. And then he goes and spends the whole bloody night with his arms around the little short-haired starry-eyed chick with platinum blonde highlights.

What the hell does he see in her? Okay, so maybe now is the time to recite all the crap about beauty being on the inside, personalities clicking and chemistry and whatever. Maybe he doesn’t like the age difference, however tiny it is. It’s a whole different system at high school. Or maybe I’m too tall for him? Maybe he likes those tiny girls he can wrap his arms round.

But who am I kidding? He was hot, but he was never going to be mine.

And I can’t help thinking, what if I’d gotten in there earlier? What if I’d set my eye on him long ago, and snatched him right from under her big protrudent nose? Shit, that would have been fun. Nasty of me to say so, but honestly, it would’ve. If only I’d been a little flirtier, a little more forward, and hadn’t just smiled absentmindedly when he tried to strike up a conversation. Maybe I gave off the impression that I wasn’t interested. Which is so not what I wanted! As ‘they’ all say, there’s plenty more fish in the sea. I should just write him off as a failed experiment, one of the many who go away.

This totally sucks.

The night wasn’t a total loss though. It was so much fun, and I went totally hyper. Just in hindsight J’s being all over the starry-eyed chick really got me down. One of the not-so-hot guys was one of the first ones to ask me to dance. Then he said my dress was pretty and that he was dancing with the most beautiful girl in the room. Which was so sweet. But so not viable – he’s not my type of guy. And we didn’t click. I think I’m slowly building up the cliff face right now, and then he’ll get so hopeful that he has a good chance – and I’ll be the one to push him off. Aren’t I a heartless bitch? I don’t want to have a huge rejection scene though, for his sake.

He asked me for my number at the end of the night. I think he was just waiting for an opportunity to break into our little circle and ask, but I just happened to catch his eye and smile and he took it as an invitation.

“So uh, I think we should catch up sometime over the holidays?”

Translation: “Please can I get your number?”

I wasn’t really interested, but I didn’t have the heart to say no. I’m not that much of a bitch. So I did, and I also gave my number to this other crazy guy who’s so much fun, but I have no idea what his name is! Two numbers! In one night! A record! Considering my record so far was none, that wasn’t very hard to beat. But still.

How much are the folks going to freak when I have random guys calling at the house?

0Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home